Manage Emotional Pain

Emotions play a significant role in our lives. Emotions are a powerful tool, and a huge motivator. We feel things when we think that something is important in our lives.

Fern leaf heartThe kind of emotion we feel depends on how something affects what we value. We feel love for example when we recognize our deepest values in someone else – like kindness, honesty, generosity, self-sacrifice etc. Conversely we feel fear when something or somebody of value to us is threatened.

Likewise, when we, other people or events behave or happen as we want, we are content or happy. But when we, people or events don’t behave as we want, we are unhappy or discontent. This is experienced as emotional discomfort or pain. Emotional pain is the opposite of feeling content or happy.

Emotional pain is an inevitable part of life. It is normal. We all experience it. Knowing that doesn’t make it any easier.

If you are dealing with emotional pain now – or have dealt with it in the past – you will know how all-consuming it can feel. It can disempower you and play havoc with your confidence and self-esteem. It can affect your sleep patterns, cause restlessness, and headaches.

Emotional pain is a lonely experience. Often people who have suffered rejection or loss feel alone and scared. The instinct is to hide away from friends and family or find ways to distract from the experience. Thoughts, behaviours and words can become inconsistent with actual experience. Some people use ways to escape from their experience by indulging in unhealthy habits or destructive activities.

The stress and anxiety of emotional pain can also be felt physically. The expression ‘gut-wrenching experience’ speaks to this. Our minds and bodies are inextricably interwoven. Stress to one can trigger a response in the other. This is because emotional and physical sensations activate the same regions of the brain, the anterior insula and the anterior cingulate cortex.

If you are dealing with emotional pain now – or have dealt with it in the past – you will know how all-consuming it can feel. Emotional pain can be larger than the suffering of physical pain.

Emotional pain can blur the good experiences that we can have in our lives. Often, we can feel powerless against these emotions because they can be so strong.

Therefore, we try to control ourselves, people, and situations to either ‘gain’ happiness or ‘avoid’ pain. But often this is not always possible and then we find ourselves feeling powerless and stuck. This is when emotional pain becomes unhealthy and debilitating, as described above.

We can find ourselves going down a vicious spiral.

The more we obsess about the situations or people we cannot control, the more negative emotions build-up like anger, disappointment, frustration and helplessness. This in turn makes us stressed and anxious. We might get panic attacks. We can’t sleep, our bodies feel awful. Emotional pain makes our physical pain more intense and weakens our immune system and make us more prone to diseases and make any conditions we have worse. As a consequence, we become unable to get on with life and to appreciate the good things and the good people around us.

So, whether the pain is associated with trauma, a loss, an expected loss or a disappointment or a deep frustration at a situation we may find ourselves in, we must develop a strategy to manage this inner turmoil so that it doesn’t take us over and prevent us from doing the things we need to do and enjoying the positive things we all too often take for granted.

We need to break the downward spiral of thinking and behaviours and address the things that are making things worse if we are to get back up to a better place.

Hypnotherapy has a proven track record of helping to alleviate emotional pain. It does this in two important and inter-related ways – through the body and the mind. Hypnotherapy as you know works by relaxing the body and this relaxes the mind. Hypnotherapy allows the mind to take time out away from inner chatter, to let things go, to see things differently, to reframe negative thoughts and perceptions. It enables our minds to open to new ways of looking at things, to take on new positive, helpful thoughts and suggestions that can take us up a positive spiral. This in turn takes the stress and pains away from our bodies so we feel better in ourselves.

Like in addressing so many things hypnotherapy works best when complemented by other helpful actions that work on the body and mind to make things easier.

For more information on how I can help you manage emotional pain and move on with your life, act now.

Email me here or call 07957 205345 for your first consultation

Phone: 07957 205345
Maidstone, Kent